Monday, November 13, 2017
I'm not sure why all of a sudden I started having these terrible symptoms but there just about unbearable. I keep calling the new psychiatrist I see in January to see if they have an open appointment. I was just told that there are two people in front of me.
I'm anxious, the feelings come and go...but when they go its like I have no feelings at all. Like an empty shell. It really sucks to feel like this. My depression isn't bad but its still there...lingering in the back ground.
I feel alone, even though my husband is 100% supportive and is trying to understand what I'm going through. I was hoping that these feelings would go away when I started back at my old job, I just don't understand why I feel the way i do? Its hard to get out of bed, it's hard to smile sometimes but I do. And since I'm on the subject..it's damn hard to find a decent psychiatrist. One that will listen and take time with you. I pray that the next one is a good fit.
And the fact that my mom got diagnosed with cancer about 2 months ago is also heavy on my mind, she doesn't look good and I can't even think about it without tearing up :-(
Until I feel better I will fight. I will try and I will make it through each day - one day at a time. After all these feeling are only temporary.
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