Thursday, November 21, 2013

Morning Mumbles ....

Good Morning

Im tired today, hopefully I will get a little kick in my step once I get to work.

And speaking of work, I cooked mostly by myself yesterday. It was intense...very intense for about 2 hours but once you get the hot bar set, it slows down considerable ( unless we run out of something). My trainer got on my nerves. I don't trust her. She kept barking orders at me and I could feel her rolling her eyes. And TBH..I don't care what she says or does, I didn't come into this job saying I could cook. Nor did I come in here to make friends. I just said I would try...and I am trying. If my best isn't good enough then they will move me to another area in the Deli. Im just happy to be back at the Grocery store again. :)

Its not the hardest job in the world but I don't see a lot of people being able to do it without freaking out. Kinda like donuts in the bakery. You have to be fast and be able to multi-task or its going to overwhelm   you!!

anyways, I will get it. It will take time.

My mind keeps going back to my weight and my workouts. I wont be truly happy until I can start getting some weight off. I keep telling myself that I'm going to get serious soon.  Its gotta be the right time for me though, and right now isn't it with the holidays approaching and me starting this job. ( just being honest here). My goal is to not gain any weight until Im ready ( probably January)  But there is one thing I can start doing right now. Upping my workouts.  I can start weight training again and getting in more intense cardio sessions. I miss it. I miss that feeling of complete calmness and exhaustion.. when I can feel my blood pumping and my muscles relaxing. It such an exhilarating feeling!!

 I really want to try and get in something after work today...yesterday my legs were screaming and my feet were aching. There was no way I could have worked out ( I would have back in the day though, nothing stopped me back then)
 when I got home, I had to take advil to stop it. If I don't get in a workout today I know I can tomorrow because im off. Yay!! And im off Saturday too Yay!!

ok...laters




Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Deli Associate - Deep Breath

Good Morning,

I've got some things on my mind this morning so I thought I would blog about it.

Yesterday was my 2nd day as a deli associate, it was a very emotional day to say the least. I went in confident and almost broke down twice. I felt like I was going to cry around 8am because I got overwhelmed and went blank. Then after lunch I got overwhelmed again and went into the cooler with tears in my eyes, but they never fell.

The cook in the Deli department has the hardest job there ( besides management) You have thirty minutes to get breakfast cooked and out ( 15 biscuits). You have 4 hours to cook 14 items including 3 veggies, mac-n-cheese, mashed potatoes, 48 pcs of fried chicken, chicken tenders, baked chicken, bbq chicken, cobbler and three back up dishes.  Its not easy....its a lot at one time. I broke down yesterday but today I will not. My trainer had to guide me yesterday but she's not aloud to do that today because tomorrow im on my own. (Deep breath) After lunch you may have to cook more chicken or mashed potatoes. If its busy. But after you set your hot bar ( food mentioned above) you can take your time until you leave. I like that part...

There is a lot of younger adults working there ( 21-28) and all they do is talk. Talk about their lives, talk about other peoples lives, talk about everybody in the grocery store....talk about everything.  And speaking of talking. My trainer told me some gossip during lunch about the bakery department. Supposedly, the Bakery Manager told a girl in confidence that she was thinking about quitting and moving to Florida to live with her boyfriend and when she's asked she denies it. I also heard that the new Assistant ( the girl I thought was my friend and the same girl that was told above in confidence) isn't doing a very good job and is always in trouble with the Bakery Manager.

ok...I gotta go and rock the deli department this morning. ;-) , wish me luck!!


Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Good Morning Blog Peeps,

My eyes popped open at 3:30 this morning and I felt fully rested, so I rolled out of bed. I did turn in pretty early last night.

Yesterday was my first day back at the grocery store. I work in the Deli department now. It was what I expected it to be - a fast pace and multi-tasking job. Yesterday I observed and today I will be doing it while my trainer observes. This coming up Thursday I will do it on my own.

Im kinda nervous but at the same time, I know once I got it...I will rock it. Its nice to have people to talk too over there.  In the bakery there was always this quiet/awkwardness feeling - specially when the Manager was there. I didn't speak to anybody in the bakery yesterday and they didn't approach me...so I guess the're still pissed that I left. Or they think im still pissed - I really don't care either way.

My eating was good yesterday and I got in another 30 minute walk. In about two weeks I plan on joining a larger gym that is about 15 minutes away. They have several classes to offer and its HUGE. I'm pretty excited. And once Christmas is over I will maybe pay for a personal trainer. Maybe they can get me motivated enough to start a new program. I would love to lose about 30lbs before summer (even 20lbs would be nice).

I still plan on going to the library to get that book I mentioned on an earlier post. I'm willing to do anything to get motivated.

So no news on my insurance yet. I started taking fish oil and a complex 'B' supplement Friday morning and by Monday I could tell. Just a peaceful feeling. I still feel it this morning. I  plan on going to the doctor for something...but until then I'm going to strap on my seat belts and ride this anxiety/depression out. I've been listening to those brain sync mp3 downloads that I bought last year. They seem to help. I also listen to a mediating 10 min-break app on my phone during breaks at work. They help too.

ok...gotta get me another cup of my 1/2 decafe coffee. Everyone have a nice day. :)


Monday, November 18, 2013

Day One.... Again

I woke up pissed at the world yesterday. But mainly I was pissed at myself. Just fed up with my excuses to eat junk and not exercise...so I said 'No' a few times and made it through the day. I MADE myself walk for 30 mins. I have to admit, I did feel better after it...

After telling myself that I wasn't going to count calories anymore I logged on this morning and entered my food for yesterday and sure enough, I was right on track. Had like 60 calories left for the day.

So today.....I'm gonna do it again. ;-)

off to start my 'new' job and the Deli as a cook. Lets see how it goes. I have a feeling I will be getting the evil eye from the bakery all day. Should be interesting.

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