Sunday, September 29, 2013

New Day :: Getting Back Up!!

So the title should give a glimpse of what im about to confess... I had a binge last night. It was enough to make me sick to my stomach. My day was good before the binge, ate about 1500 calories and got in two workouts. I was fine until that night time munchie monster came out around 8pm and she was vicious too.

I couldn't sleep last night and I'm about 99% sure it was because of the binge :(  This is what I ate:::
1 bowl of puffed wheat cereal w/2% milk ( I was planning on stopping here)
two servings of chips
1 party pizza
3 pancakes with sugar free syrup

All of this was in about 40 mins :(

I know its because of anxiety, I had a bad anxiety attack Friday afternoon ( racing thought, dizzy spells and emotions all over the place) Lately we've been experiencing some financial problems and I've had to ask for assistance through the government. Well its almost impossible to get those kinds of organizations on the phone. I was on hold for an hour Friday morning to see how a it was going and the case worker was rude ,unhelpful and told me I was denied. she later hung up on  me while I was in mid-sentence, trying to explain something. Then later that day I got a curtsy call from the power company about a disconnect so I had to call them and try to figure something out.

sigh, and whats worse is that this is my fault. I quit my job and now were dealing with delinquent bills. :(

I just keep praying that things will get better. I'm starting my job tomorrow so things will have too..

Im suppose to get insurance towards the end of October ( even though he was suppose to get it three weeks ago, his company is in the middle of an insurance change so its delaying open enrollment) and I plan on going to a doctor about my anxiety. I don't want to take just anything but I feel as if I need something. I just hope it doesn't delay any weight loss. I think I will try a second opinion too. I just want to feel like myself again, everyday that I wake up I never know how im going to feel? At least my depression is almost gone, it was really bad after I quit my job. I didn't want to get out of bed. babbling now. Have a great Sunday :)


  1. Oh sweety! I feel for you! This too shall pass xoxo

    1. Thank you, im feeling better today. Still can't stay away from the junk though :( one day I will...


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