Monday, July 22, 2013

I Talked to the Store Manager...

....and he said he will see what he can do to get me out of the bakery.

I basically told him that I was no longer happy in the bakery! He asked why?  I said without going into a lot of detail how I can't get along w/the bakery manager anymore. He asked if I've spoken to her...I said no, she's hard to talk to. He said he understood that.  He then said he didn't have any openings anywhere else in the store unless I switched with someone in the deli. Then he said to let him think about it and for me to 'keep it under my hat' for now.

So im not sure whats going to happen? :/  He's very laid back and the switch could take weeks. I'm going to call tomorrow evening and get my schedule or go up there tomorrow night and just look at it. I'll know if he talked to her because i will get a bad schedule...yeah, shes that type of person. I was so frustrated with her on Thursday that I wanted to quit. I didn't want to go back to work. Like I said, she's very manipulative about a lot of things and for the past two years ive kept quiet and ignored her...but I just can't do it anymore.

Im going to another grocery store after my husband gets home from work today to fill out an application. I'm hoping they need a cake decorator or just someone in the bakery or anywhere in the store for that matter. I will keep updates on that.

So, with my anxiety up everyday i've had trouble staying on my food plan. My mood is so hard to control and it seems like the only thing that helps me forget about things is food. But I know im just eating my feelings and thats how I got to be 278lbs. Yesterday I went out and bought a new food diary (2$ notebook) and I plan on writing down everything I eat again. Even if I don't want too or don't feel like it. I have a calorie limit thats reasonable for my weight. It does allow some calories for my workouts so its nothing crazy like 1200 calories.
 sigh, well at least ive been exercising. I love my workouts. I love my gym...i just wish they had more classes geared toward women.  There is a gym not too far from me that offers all the classes I want to take for only 20$ a month. I'm going to check it out on my way to fill out that application later today.

Lately I've been reading a lot of different articles on low carb diets ( like the one ive been following for the past two weeks) and from what I gather - eating low carb isn't something that someone with a history of anxiety/depression needs to do. Apparently the body needs some carbs in order to produce serotonin. A chemical in the brain that helps to regulate mood, appetite, and sleep. So with me eating less then 100gs of carbs a day and doing 60 mins of cardio almost every day - its no wonder my mood is marked as 'crazy and unstable' right now! HA


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