Sunday, April 03, 2011

Dark Place

Ive got to stop this. Seriously... I feel like a failure this morning. Last night i knew what I was doing when i sat and just ate mindlessly :(

There is something inside me that is screaming and i keep trying to feed it, literally.  It's not working. I want to cry right now...i want to scream and yell at this weak person. This is not me, im strong...i don't let anything break my focus when I have a goal.  Its almost like its one way or the other with me...there is never a happy medium.

Im in a dark place right now...trying to climb my way out of it. Really sucks! I'm a very happy person and this isn't me, AT ALL. If it keeps going on like this...if I'm still fighting this in another week, I may have to make a doctors appointment :(  Its not fair to me or my family to have this walking sad zombie posing as mommy.

I wish my damn period would start already. (and no, im not pregnant...can't get pregnant )

UPDATE: OH MY GOSH...i just went back in my blog and found this post. I felt this way at the same exact time last month. But I didn't let it get to me or mess up my diet plan. This is huge in my mind guys...HUGE. Now I know im not having some breakdown or something ( I can get a little paranoid at times) I know that this is normal....its hormonal.  Whew,lol.

ps. Im reading all my blogs that I follow and just wanted to say thanks for lifting my spirits :) Now its time for me to do some lifting...heavy weight lifting that is :P

2 comments:

  1. Wow, I'm really glad you posted that update! I'm sorry things are so awful right now. That time of the month must be a real b**** for you. Hormones SUCK.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Christina...that means a lot :) Time of the month can really throw me a side ball sometimes :/

    ReplyDelete

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