Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Unexceptionable Behavior !!

I was feeling down this morning so some blogging is in order here. Here's the situation:

Since last Thursday i have been off my healthy eating plan and its bringing me down. I haven't counted calories and only got in a handful of workouts due to my congestion. I wake up every morning and think "I will get back on track today", then BOOM, my will power is gone and I'm @ss deep in a bowl of ice cream. We have been eating out a lot lately too, I think that's my biggest problem. I love eating out, and its hard for me to stay on plan when I eat out seeing my hubby and kids eat junk. I want that junk too!! Maybe i feel deprived?

Unfortunately my mood is a direct reflection of my eating. Its mostly the guilt that has me down today. I've kept my calories around maintenance today (2200), plus I got in a really good run interval on the treadmill for 58mins burning 400 calories,.... but dang..its hard to stay focused on the eating part when I'm obviously just not into it right now. We have left over chicken in the fridge and I had absolutely no intention of eating it. Then I got it in my head of how yummy it is and couldn't get it out and BOOM...im eating a plate :(

I'm fueling some emotion here but what? I honestly don't know? Or am I fueling an emotion...is that just an excuse? I think the bottom line here is that i like to eat and since i have to eat in order to live i will have to learn balance. In other words...just because i want to eat a whole bucket of chicken and the fact that im sure i could, doesn't give me the right too. I have to respect my body here. Am I right?

Oh well...the world will keep spinning and the sun will come out tomorrow. I just hate this feeling ~ I expect more out of myself and I know what I'm capable of, this is just unexceptionable behavior!  Its BS!!

ok...Im through bitching now..

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